Relationship Fighting in a Healthy Way

No relationship is perfect. Even the most stable soul mates have problems from time to time. But arguments don't have to end in tears, silence, or slamming doors. Even a simple argument can be productive.

We asked three couple therapists in our network to share the tips they follow to save their relationships when they find themselves in a difficult situation. Here are tips for discussing with your partner how to promote communication, compromise, and respect.

Conflict is normal if you live in a healthy relationship.

But arguments don't have to be door slamming, swearing, and silence. It is possible to argue with respect and care for each other and be happy together.

So, if you want to argue constructively with your partner, remember these top tips from a life coach for arguing.

 

Six tips for couples' healthy fighting

Always pause before speaking.

If you are in a hurry, it can be difficult to process your thoughts and formulate them correctly before you start communicating. It's a good idea to take a break before you start talking. This way, you can make sure that what you say is objective and avoid negative words. This may seem difficult, but it is the only way to ensure that the situation does not escalate.

Try to find a sense of humour.

A good sense of humor is a very attractive quality that people look for when seeking a relationship. If the same can be applied to fighting, the situation will be slightly less intense. It also depends on the nature of the conflict, but a little humor can go a long way.

Avoid attacks on people.

Unfortunately, conversations often end in personal attacks (think about criticizing the other person or their appearance), which is certainly not healthy for the relationship. If you swear, you are probably going too far.

Focus on the real issues.

If you repeat the same arguments, discuss the same things over and over again without finding solutions or compromises, or if you get irritated by constant disagreements, it can be problematic.

Do not avoid conversations.

Many couples keep quiet when they are angry with each other because they are afraid of causing an argument that could damage their relationship. However, new research has shown that avoiding such arguments can hurt rather than improve relationships.

Don't threaten to leave your partner.

It's easy to let emotions get the better of you, but try not to threaten separation or divorce. Whether you mean it or not, these words can leave a lasting impression on anyone who hears them and make the relationship volatile long after the argument is over.